Today, I went out to lunch with coworkers and I ordered a well done burger. The burger came and when I cut it in half it was pink. So I sent it back. Came back streaming hot. So I ate. I noticed some light pink in it (no raw spots) but I continued to eat at the end I was so upset I almost had a mild anxiety attack.
This pregnancy thing is a lot harder than I expected; I worry all the time. I worry about miscarriage, what I eat, what life is going to be like, etc.
On another note, while my wifey is happy about this pregnancy she is also feeling some anxiety. Like did we do the right thing and how will our child feel with two moms and will society accept he or she! Plus I think she is also struggling with the fact that its technically not related to get. She had the option and She did not want to be pregnant or to use her eggs. So we always continued with me. I've always wanted to be pregnant. So my wifeys feelings are adding to the worry.
Plus, wifey told her parents today and they were not to thrilled. Especially her mother who claimed this would not be her grandchild. Why was I the one having the kid. Her dad asked why we did not adopt so it would both be equally ours.
It's hard for me to see this perspective since my parents have been supportive. Plus, my dad is not my biological father; but he is in every form my dad... heck I even act like him. I do not believe blood makes you a parent or a grandparent.., love does. I just wish my inlaws or my mother in law I should say could understand this. I know it upsets my wife and it upsets me. I hope once the baby gets here she will feel differently.
Ok enough rambling... Just had to get this off my chest.
Oh my goodness, you have a lot going on! I'm sorry to hear about the wife's parents' reactions and your wife's anxiety. You will just have to keep reassuring yourself that you know that this baby is both of yours. Blood doesn't make the connection. I carried our daughter and she acts more like her non-bio mama than me any day!
ReplyDeleteAlso, the eating thing is common. And frankly, you are going to find one site that says a specific thing is ok to eat and another site that will say not to eat it. One doctor will say yes and another may say no. So with your gut and your common sense, sweetie!
I know it's hard to do, but try to relax and enjoy. More stress on you just makes things harder on the baby! Of course, you knew that. And, I am preaching words I didn't follow in my own pregnancy, but if there's one thing I wish I did - it was worry less and enjoy more.
Hang in there girl! I'm sure everything will turn out fine!
I wish I could tell you that the worrying stops but unfortunately it doesn't. Now that my kiddo is 15 months I still worry, I just worry about different things than when she was a baby. That just comes with parenting I think. I'm sorry to hear about your honey's parents. We went through similar struggles with a few family members when G was prego with Grace. The great thing is that once your beautiful little baby arrives, everyone tends to fall in love and forget they ever had an issue.
ReplyDeleteI think the thing that helped me to feel connected to Grace when G was carrying was that she made sure I was a part of everything. I was in every appointment and had a say in every decision. There were still times that I felt not as connected as her, but those were few and far between.
I hope things get less stressful for you gals in the coming weeks. I have no doubt they will. ;)
I'm so sorry about your wife's parents reaction. It's hard to handle that sort of thing. We had a bad reaction from my partners brother and family, but they eventually came around.
ReplyDeleteAs for the eating thing, well yep, I struggling majorly up until 14 weeks when I no longer had morning sickness. However it's now been replaced with Gestational Diabetes (diagnosed at 20 weeks), so I'm finding it hard to be creative with such a restrictive diet...and I've lost weight!
I hope everything gets better and less stressful for you!
Maybe send this to your wife's parents...http://www.smh.com.au/national/children-of-samesex-couples-thriving-study-20130605-2nqjy.html